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new moon(暮光之城-新月英文版)-第64部分

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totally useless。 I couldn't be 
around my family—I couldn't be around anyone。 I'm embarrassed to admit that I 
more or less curled up 
into a ball and let the misery have me。〃 He grinned; sheepish。 〃It was much 
more pathetic than hearing 
voices。 And; of course; you know I do that; too。〃 
I was deeply relieved that he really seemed to understand—forted that this 
all made sense to him。 At 
any rate; he wasn't looking at me like I was crazy。 He was looking at me like
 he loved me。 
〃I only heard one voice;〃 I corrected him。 
He laughed and then pulled me tight against his right side and started to lead 
me forward。 
〃I'm just humoring you with this。〃 He motioned broadly with his hand toward 
the darkness in front of us 
as we walked。 There was something pale and immense there—the house; I 
realized。 〃It doesn't matter in 
the slightest what they say。〃 
〃This affects them now; too。〃 
He shrugged indifferently。 
He led me through the open front door into the dark house and flipped the 
lights on。 The room was just 
as I'd remembered it—the piano and the white couches and the pale; massive 
staircase。 No dust; no 
white sheets。 
Edward called out the names with no more volume than I'd use in regular 
conversation。 〃Carlisle? Esme? 
Rosalie? Emmett? Jasper? Alice?〃 They would hear。 
Carlisle was suddenly standing beside me; as if he'd been there all along。 
〃Wele back; Bella。〃 He 
smiled。 〃What can we do for you this morning? I imagine; due to the hour; that 
this is not a purely social 
visit?〃 
I nodded。 〃I'd like to talk to everyone at once; if that's okay。 About 
something important。〃 
I couldn't help glancing up at Edward's face as I spoke。 His expression was 
critical; but resigned。 When I 
looked back to Carlisle; he was looking at Edward; too。 
〃Of course;〃 Carlisle said。 〃Why don't we talk in the other room?〃 
Carlisle led the way through the bright living room; around the corner to the 
dining room; turning on lights 
as he went。 The walls were white; the ceilings high; like the living room。 In 
the center of the room; under 
the low…hanging chandelier; was a large; polished oval table surrounded by 
eight chairs。 Carlisle held out 
a chair for me at the head。 
I'd never seen the Cullens use the dining room table before—it was just a 
prop。 They didn't eat in the 
house。 
As soon as I turned to sit in the chair; I saw that we were not alone。 Esme 
had followed Edward; and 
behind her the rest of the family filed in。 
Carlisle sat down on my right; and Edward on my left。 Everyone else took their 
seats in silence。 Alice 
was grinning at me; already in on the plot。 Emmett and Jasper looked curious; 
and Rosalie smiled at me 
tentatively。 My answering smile was just as timid。 That was going to take some 
getting used to。 
Carlisle nodded toward me。 〃The floor is yours。〃 
I swallowed。 Their gazing eyes made me nervous。 Edward took my hand under the 
table。 I peeked at 
him; but he was watching the others; his fate suddenly fierce。 
〃Well;〃 I paused。 〃I'm hoping Alice has already told you everything that 
happened in Volterra?〃 
〃Everything;〃 Alice assured me。 
I threw her a meaningful look。 〃And on the way?〃 
〃That; too;〃 she nodded。 
〃Good;〃 I sighed with relief。 〃Then we're all on the same page。〃 
They waited patiently while I tried to order my thoughts。 
〃So; I have a problem;〃 I began。 〃Alice promised the Volturi that I would 
bee one of you。 They're 
going to send someone to check; and I'm sure that's a bad thing—something to 
avoid。 
〃And so; now; this involves you all。 I'm sorry about that。〃 I looked at each 
one of their beautiful faces; 
saving the most beautiful for last。 Edward's mouth was turned down into a 
grimace。 〃But; if you don't 
want me; then I'm not going to force myself on you; whether Alice is willing 
or not。〃 
Esme opened her mouth to speak; but I held up one finger to stop her。 
〃Please; let me finish。 You all know what I want。 And I'm sure you know what 
Edward thinks; too。 I 
think the only fair way to decide is for everyone to have a vote。 If you 
decide you don't want me; then 
I guess I'll go back to Italy alone。 I can't have them ing here。〃 My 
forehead creased as I considered 
that。 
There was the faint rumble of a growl in Edward's chest。 I ignored him。 
〃Taking into account; then; that I won't put any of you in danger either way; 
I want you to vote yes or no 
on the issue of me being a vampire。〃 
I half…smiled on the last word; and gestured toward Carlisle to begin。 
〃Just a minute;〃 Edward interrupted。 
I glared at him through narrowed eyes。 He raised his eyebrows at me; squeezing 
my hand。 
〃I have something to add before we vote。〃 
I sighed。 
〃About the danger Bella's referring to;〃 he continued。 〃I don't think we need 
to be overly anxious。〃 
His expression became more animated。 He put his free hand on the shining table 
and leaned forward。 
〃You see;〃 he explained; looking around the table while he spoke; 〃there was 
more than one reason why 
I didn't want to shake Aro's hand there at the end。 There's something they 
didn't think of; and I didn't 
want to cine them in。〃 He grinned。 
〃Which was?〃 Alice prodded。 I was sure my expression was just as skeptical as 
hers。 
〃The Volturi are overconfident; and with good reason。 When they decide to find 
someone; it's not really a 
problem。 Do you remember Demetri?〃 He glanced down at me。 
I shuddered。 He took that as a yes。 
〃He finds people—that's his talent; why they keep him。 
〃Now; the whole time we were with any of them; I was picking their brains for 
anything that might save 
us; getting as much information as possible。 So I saw how Demetri's talent 
works。 He's a tracker—a 
tracker a thousand times more gifted than Jarres was。 His ability is loosely 
related to what I do; or what 
Aro does。 He catches the flavor? I don't know how to describe it the tenor
 of someone's mind; 
and then he follows that。 It works over immense distances。 
〃But after Aro's little experiments; well〃 Edward shrugged。 
〃You think he won't be able to find me;〃 I said flatly。 
He was smug。 〃I'm sure of it。 He relies totally on that other sense。 When it 
doesn't work with you; they'll 
all be blind。〃 
〃And how does that solve anything?〃 
〃Quite obviously; Alice will be able to tell when they're planning a visit; 
and I'll hide you。 They'll be 
helpless;〃 he said with fierce enjoyment。 〃It will be like looking for a piece 
of straw in a haystack!〃 
He and Emmett exchanged a glance and a smirk。 
This made no sense。 〃But they can find you;〃 I reminded him。 
〃And I can take care of myself。〃 
Emmett laughed; and reached across the table toward his brother; extending a 
fist。 
〃Excellent plan; my brother;〃 he said with enthusiasm。 
Edward stretched out his arm to smack Emmett's fist with his own。 
〃No;〃 Rosalie hissed。 
〃Absolutely not;〃 I agreed。 
〃Nice。〃 Jasper's voice was appreciative。 
〃Idiots;〃 Alice muttered。 
Esme just glared at Edward。 
I straightened up in my chair; focusing。 This was my meeting。 
〃All right; then。 Edward has offered an alternative for you to consider;〃 I 
said coolly。 〃Let's vote。〃 
I looked toward Edward this time; it would be better to get his opinion out of 
the way。 〃Do you want me 
to join your family?〃 
His eyes were hard and black as flint。 〃Not that way。 You're staying human。〃 
I nodded once; keeping my face businesslike; and then moved on。 
〃Alice?〃 
〃Yes。〃 
〃Jasper?〃 
〃Yes;〃 he said; voice grave。 I was a little surprised—I hadn't been at all 
sure of his vote—but I 
suppressed my reaction and moved on。 
〃Rosalie?〃 
She hesitated; biting down on her full; perfect bottom lip。 〃No。〃 
I kept my face blank and turned my head slightly to move on; but she held up 
both her hands; palms 
forward。 
〃Let me explain;〃 she pleaded。 〃I don't mean that I have any aversion to you 
as a sister。 It's just that 
this is not the life I would have chosen for myself。 I wish there had been 
someone there to vote no for 
me。〃 
I nodded slowly; and then turned to Emmett。 
〃Hell; yes!〃 He grinned。 〃We can find some other way to pick a fight with this 
Demetri。〃 
I was still grimacing at that when I looked at Esme。 
〃Yes; of course; Bella。 I already think of you as part of my family。〃 
〃Thank you; Esme;〃 I murmured as I turned toward Carlisle。 
I was suddenly nervous; wishing I had asked for his vote first。 I was sure 
that this was the vote that 
mattered most; the vote that counted more than any majority。 
Carlisle wasn't looking at me。 
〃Edward;〃 he said。 
〃No;〃 Edward growled。 His jaw was strained tight; his lips curled back from 
his teeth。 
〃It's the only way that makes sense;〃 Carlisle insisted。 〃You've chosen not to 
live without her; and that 
doesn't leave me a choice。〃 
Edward dropped my hand; shoving away from the table。 He stalked out of the 
room; snarling under his 
breath。 
〃I guess you know my vote。〃 Carlisle sighed。 
I was still staring after Edward。 〃Thanks;〃 I mumbled。 
An earsplitting crash echoed from the other room。 
I flinched; and spoke quickly。 〃That's all I needed。 Thank you。 For wanting to 
keep me。 I feel exactly the 
same way about all of you; too。〃 My voice was jagged with emotion by the end。 
Esme was at my side in a flash; her cold arms around me。 
〃Dearest Bella;〃 she breathed。 
I hugged her back。 Out of the corner of my eye; I noticed Rosalie looking down 
at the table; and I 
realized that my words could be construed in two ways。 
〃Well; Alice;〃 I said when Esme released me。 〃Where do you want to do this?〃 
Alice stared at me; her eyes widening with terror。 
〃No! No! NO!〃 Edward roared; charging back into the room。 He was in my face 
before I had time to 
blink; bending over me; his expression twisted in rage。 〃Are you insane?〃 he 
shouted。 〃Have you utterly 
lost your mind?〃 
I cringed away; my hands over my ears。 
〃Um; Bella;〃 Alice interjected in an anxious voice。 〃I don't think I'm ready 
for that。 I'll need to prepare〃 
〃You promised;〃 I reminded her; glaring under Edward's arm。 
〃I know; but Seriously; Bella! I don't have any idea how to not killyou。〃 
〃You can do it;〃 I encouraged。 〃I trust you。〃 
Edward snarled in fury。 
Alice shook her head quickly; looking panicked。 
〃Carlisle?〃 I turned to look at him。 
Edward grabbed my face in his hand; forcing me to look at him。 His other hand 
was out; palm toward 
Carlisle。 
Carlisle ignored that。 〃I'm able to do it;〃 he answered my question。 I wished 
I could see his expression。 
〃You would be in no danger of me losing control。〃 
〃Sounds good。〃 I hoped he could understand; it was hard to talk clearly the 
way Edward held my jaw。 
〃Hold on;〃 Edward said between his teeth。 〃It doesn't have to be now。〃 
〃There's no reason for it not to be now;〃 I said; the words ing out 
distorted。 
〃I can think of a few。〃 
〃Of course you can;〃 I said sourly。 〃Now let go of me。〃 
He freed my face; and folded his arms across his chest。 〃In about two hours; 
Charlie will be here looking 
for you。 I wouldn't put it past him to involve the police。〃 
〃All three of them。〃 But I frowned。 
This was always the hardest part。 Charlie; Renee。 Now Jacob; too。 The people I 
would lose; th
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