红字-the scarlet letter(英文版)-第32部分

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of　more　thana　temporary　struggle。　He　sank　down　on　the　ground；　and　buried　hisface　in　his　hands。　　〃I　might　have　known　it；〃　murmured　he。　〃I　did　know　it！　Was　not　thesecret　told　me；　in　the　natural　recoil　of　my　heart；　at　the　firstsight　of　him；　and　as　often　as　I　have　seen　him　since？　Why　did　I　notunderstand？　O　Hester　Prynne；　thou　little；　little　knowest　all　thehorror　of　this　thing！　And　the　shame！…　the　indelicacy！…　the　horribleugliness　of　this　exposure　of　a　sick　and　guilty　heart　to　the　very　eyethat　would　gloat　over　it？　Woman；　woman；　thou　are　accountable　for　this！I　cannot　forgive　thee！〃　　〃Thou　shalt　forgive　me！〃　cried　Hester；　flinging　herself　on　thefallen　leaves　beside　him。　〃Let　God　punish！　Thou　shalt　forgive！〃　　With　sudden　and　desperate　tenderness；　she　threw　her　arms　around　him；and　pressed　his　head　against　her　bosom；　little　caring　though　his　cheekrested　on　the　scarlet　letter。　He　would　have　released　himself；　butstrove　in　vain　to　do　so。　Hester　would　not　set　him　free；　lest　he　shouldlook　her　sternly　in　the　face。　All　the　world　had　frowned　on　her…　forseven　long　years　had　it　frowned　upon　this　lonely　woman…　and　stillshe　bore　it　all；　nor　ever　once　turned　away　her　firm；　sad　eyes。　Heaven；likewise；　had　frowned　upon　her；　and　she　had　not　died。　But　the　frown　ofthis　pale；　weak；　sinful；　and　sorrow…stricken　man　was　what　Hester　couldnot　bear；　and　live！　　〃Wilt　thou　yet　forgive　me？〃　she　repeated；　over　and　over　again。　〃Wiltthou　not　frown？　Wilt　thou　forgive？〃　　〃I　do　forgive　you；　Hester；〃　replied　the　minister；　at　length；　witha　deep　utterance；　out　of　an　abyss　of　sadness；　but　no　anger。　〃Ifreely　forgive　you　now。　May　God　forgive　us　both！　We　are　not；　Hester；the　worst　sinners　in　the　world。　There　is　one　worse　than　even　thepolluted　priest！　That　old　man's　revenge　has　been　blacker　than　mysin。　He　has　violated；　in　cold　blood；　the　sanctity　of　a　human　heart。Thou　and　I；　Hester；　never　did　so！〃　　〃Never；　never！〃　whispered　she。　〃What　we　did　had　a　consecration　ofits　own。　We　felt　it　so！　We　said　so　to　each　other！　Hast　thouforgotten　it？〃　　〃Hush；　Hester！〃　said　Arthur　Dimmesdale；　rising　from　the　ground。　〃No；I　have　not　forgotten！〃　　They　sat　down　again；　side　by　side；　and　hand　clasped　in　hand；　onthe　mossy　trunk　of　the　fallen　tree。　Life　had　never　brought　them　agloomier　hour；　it　was　the　point　whither　their　pathway　had　so　long　beentending；　and　darkening　ever；　as　it　stole　along；　and　yet　it　encloseda　charm　that　made　them　linger　upon　it；　and　claim　another；　and　another；and；　after　all；　another　moment。　The　forest　was　obscure　around　them；and　creaked　with　a　blast　that　was　passing　through　it。　The　boughswere　tossing　heavily　above　their　heads；　while　one　solemn　old　treegroaned　dolefully　to　another；　as　if　telling　the　sad　story　of　thepair　that　sat　beneath；　or　constrained　to　forbode　evil　to　e。　　And　yet　they　lingered。　How　dreary　looked　the　forest…track　that　ledbackward　to　the　settlement；　where　Hester　Prynne　must　take　up　again　theburden　of　her　ignominy；　and　the　minister　the　hollow　mockery　of　hisgood　name！　So　they　lingered　an　instant　longer。　No　golden　light　hadever　been　so　precious　as　the　gloom　of　this　dark　forest。　Here；　seenonly　by　his　eyes；　the　scarlet　letter　need　not　burn　into　the　bosom　ofthe　fallen　woman！　Here；　seen　only　by　her　eyes；　Arthur　Dimmesdale；false　to　God　and　man；　might　be　for　one　moment　true！　　He　started　at　a　thought　that　suddenly　occurred　to　him。　　〃Hester；〃　cried　he；　〃here　is　a　new　horror！　Roger　Chillingworth　knowsyour　purpose　to　reveal　his　true　character。　Will　he　continue；　then；to　keep　our　secret？　What　will　now　be　the　course　of　his　revenge？〃　　〃There　is　a　strange　secrecy　in　his　nature；〃　replied　Hesterthoughtfully；　〃and　it　has　grown　upon　him　by　the　hidden　practices　ofhis　revenge。　I　deem　it　not　likely　that　he　will　betray　the　secret。　Hewill　doubtless　seek　other　means　of　satiating　his　dark　passion。〃　　〃And　I！…　how　am　I　to　live　longer；　breathing　the　same　air　with　thisdeadly　enemy？〃　exclaimed　Arthur　Dimmesdale；　shrinking　withinhimself；　and　pressing　his　hand　nervously　against　his　heart…　agesture　that　had　grown　involuntary　with　him。　〃Think　for　me；　Hester！Thou　art　strong。　Resolve　for　me！〃　　〃Thou　must　dwell　no　longer　with　this　man；〃　said　Hester；　slowly　andfirmly。　〃Thy　heart　must　be　no　longer　under　his　evil　eye！〃　　〃It　were　far　worse　than　death！〃　replied　the　minister。　〃But　how　toavoid　it？　What　choice　remains　to　me？　Shall　I　lie　down　again　on　thesewithered　leaves；　where　I　cast　myself　when　thou　didst　tell　me　what　hewas？　Must　I　sink　down　there；　and　die　at　once？〃　　〃Alas；　what　a　ruin　has　befallen　thee！〃　said　Hester；　with　thetears；　gushing　into　her　eyes。　〃Wilt　thou　die　for　very　weakness？There　is　no　other　cause！〃　　〃The　judgment　of　God　is　on　me；〃　answered　the　conscience…strickenpriest。　〃It　is　too　mighty　for　me　to　struggle　with！〃　　〃Heaven　would　show　mercy；〃　rejoined　Hester；　〃hadst　thou　but　thestrength　to　take　advantage　of　it。〃　　〃Be　thou　strong　for　me！〃　answered　he。　〃Advise　me　what　to　do。〃　　〃Is　the　world；　then；　so　narrow？〃　exclaimed　Hester　Prynne；　fixing　herdeep　eyes　on　the　minister's；　and　instinctively　exercising　a　magicpower　over　a　spirit　so　shattered　and　subdued　that　it　could　hardly　holditself　erect。　〃Doth　the　universe　lie　within　the　pass　of　yondertown；　which　only　a　little　time　ago　was　but　a　leaf…strewn　desert；　aslonely　as　this　around　us？　Whither　leads　yonder　forest…track？Backward　to　the　settlement；　thou　sayest！　Yes；　but　onward；　too！Deeper　it　goes；　and　deeper；　into　the　wilderness；　less　plainly　to　beseen　at　every　step；　until；　some　few　miles　hence；　the　yellow　leaveswill　show　no　vestige　of　the　white　man's　tread。　There　thou　art　free！　Sobrief　a　journey　would　bring　thee　from　a　world　where　thou　hast　beenmost　wretched；　to　one　where　thou　mayest　still　be　happy！　Is　there　notshade　enough　in　all　this　boundless　forest　to　hide　thy　heart　from　thegaze　of　Roger　Chillingworth？〃　　〃Yes；　Hester；　but　only　under　the　fallen　leaves！〃　replied　theminister；　with　a　sad　smile。　　〃Then　there　is　the　broad　pathway　of　the　sea！〃　continued　Hester。〃It　brought　thee　hither。　If　thou　so　choose；　it　will　bear　thee　backagain。　In　our　native　land；　whether　in　some　remote　rural　village　orin　vast　London…　or；　surely；　in　Germany；　in　France；　in　pleasantItaly…　thou　wouldst　be　beyond　his　power　and　knowledge！　And　what　hastthou　to　do　with　all　these　iron　men；　and　their　opinions？　They　have　keptthy　better　part　in　bondage　too　long　already！〃　　〃It　cannot　be！〃　answered　the　minister；　listening　as　if　he　werecalled　upon　to　realise　a　dream。　〃I　am　powerless　to　go！　Wretched　andsinful　as　I　am；　I　have　had　no　other　thought　than　to　drag　on　my　earthlyexistence　in　the　sphere　where　Providence　hath　placed　me。　Lost　as　myown　soul　is；　I　would　still　do　what　I　may　for　other　human　souls！　I　darenot　quit　my　post；　though　an　unfaithful　sentinel；　whose　sure　rewardis　death　and　dishonour；　when　his　dreary　watch　shall　e　to　an　end！〃　　〃Thou　art　crushed　under　this　seven　years'　weight　of　misery；〃　repliedHester；　fervently　resolved　to　buoy　him　up　with　her　own　energy。　〃Butthou　shalt　leave　it　all　behind　thee！　It　shall　not　cumber　thy　steps；　asthou　treadest　along　the　forest…path；　neither　shalt　thou　freight　theship　with　it；　if　thou　prefer　to　cross　the　sea。　Leave　this　wreck　andruin　here　where　it　hath　happened。　Meddle　no　more　with　it！　Begin　allanew！　Hast　thou　exhausted　possibility　in　the　failure　of　this　orial？　Not　so！　The　future　is　yet　full　of　trial　and　success。　There　ishappiness　to　be　enjoyed！　There　is　good　to　be　done！　Exchange　this　falselife　of　thine　for　a　true　one。　Be；　if　thy　spirit　summon　thee　to　sucha　mission；　the　teacher　and　apostle　of　the　red　men。　Or…　as　is　morethy　nature…　be　a　scholar　and　a　sage　among　the　wisest　and　the　mostrenowned　of　the　cultivated　world。　Preach！　Write！　Act！　Do　anything；save　to　lie　down　and　die！　Give　up　this　name　of　Arthur　Dimmesdale；and　make　thyself　another；　and　a　high　one；　such　as　thou　canst　wearwithout　fear　or　shame。　Why　wouldst　thou　tarry　so　much　as　one　other　dayin　the　torments　that　have　so　gnawed　into　thy　life！…　that　have　madethee　feeble　to　will　and　to　do！…　that　will　leave　thee　powerless　even　torepent！　Up；　and　away！〃　　〃O　Hester！〃　cried　Arthur　Dimmesdale；　in　whose　eyes　a　fitful　light；kindled　by　her　enthusiasm；　flashed　up　and　died　away；　〃thou　tellestof　running　a　race　to　a　man　whose　knees　are　tottering　beneath　him！　Imust　die　here！　There　is　not　the　strength　or　courage　left　me　to　ventureinto　the　wide；　strange；　difficult　world；　alone！〃　　It　was　the　last　expression　of　the　despondency　of　a　broken　spirit。　Helacked　energy　to　grasp　the　better　fortune　that　seemed　within　hisreach。　　He　repeated　the　word。　　〃Alone；　Hester！〃　　〃Thou　shalt　not　go　alone！〃　answered　she；　in　a　deep　whisper。　　　Then；　all　was　spoken！　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　XVIII。　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　A　FLOOD　OF　SUNSHINE。　　ARTHUR　DIMMESDALE　gazed　into　Hester's　face　with　a　look　in　which　hopeand　joy　shone　out；　indeed；　but　with　fear　betwixt　them；　and　a　kind　ofhorror　at　her　boldness；　who　had　spoken　what　he　vaguely　hinted　at；but　dared　not　speak。　　But　Hester　Prynne；　with　a　mind　of　native　courage　and　activity；　andfor　so　long　a　period　not　merely　estranged；　but　outlawed；　from　society；had　habituated　herself　to　such　latitude　of　speculation　as　wasaltogether　foreign　to　the　clergyman。　She　had　wandered；　without　rule　orguidance；　in　a　moral　wilderness；　as　vast；　as　intricate　and　shadowy；　asthe　untamed　forest；　amid　the　gloom　of　which　they　were　now　holding　acolloquy　that　was　to　decide　their　fate。　Her　intellect　and　heart　hadtheir　home；　as　it　were；　in　desert　places；　where　she　roamed　as　freelyas　the　wild　Indian　in　his　woods。　For　years　past　she　had　looked　fromthis　estranged　point　of　view　at　human　institutions；　and　whateverpriests　or　legislators　had　established；　criticising　all　with　hardlymore　reverence　than　the　Indian　would　feel　for　the　clerical　band；　thejudicial　robe；　the　pillory；　the　gallows；　the　fireside；　or　thechurch。　The　tendency　of　her　fate　and　fortunes　had　been　to　set　herfree。　The　scarlet　letter　was　her　passport　into　regions　where　otherwomen　dared　not　tread。　Shame；　Despair；　Solitude！　These　had　been　herteachers…　stern　and　wild　ones…　and　they　had　made　her　strong；　buttaught　her　much　amiss。　　The　minister；　on　the　other　hand；　had　never　gone　through　anexperience　calculated　to　lead　him　beyond　the　scope　of　generallyreceived　laws；　although；　in　a　single　instance；　he　had　so　fearfullytransgressed　one　of　the　most　sacred　of　them。　But　this　had　been　a　sinof　passion；　not　of　principle；　nor　even　purpose。　Since　that　wretchedepoch；　he　had　watched；　with　morbid　zeal　and　minuteness；　not　hisacts…　for　those　it　was　easy　to　arrange…　but　each　breath　of　emotion；and　his　every　thought。　At　the　head　of　the　social　system；　as　theclergyman　of　that　day　stood；　he　was　only　the　more　trammelled　by　itsregulations；　its　principles；　and　even　its　prejudices。　As　a　priest；　theframework　of　his　order　inevitably　hemmed　him　in。　As　a　man　who　had　oncesinned；　but　who　kept　his　conscience　all　alive　and　painfullysensitive　by　the　fretting　of　an　unhealed　wound；　he　might　have　beensupposed　safer　within　the　line　of　virtue　than　if　he　had　never　sinnedat　all。　　Thus；　we　seem　to　see　that；　as　regarded　Hester　Prynne；　the　wholeseven　years　of　outlaw　and　ignominy　had　been　little　other　than　apreparation　for　this　very　hour。　But　Arthur　Dimmesdale！　Were　such　a　manonce　more　to　fall；　what　plea　could　be　urged　in　extenuation　of　hiscrime？　None；　unless　it　avail　him　somewhat；　that　he　was　broken　downby　long　and　exquisite　suffering；　that　his　mind　was　darkened　andcon