5 midnight sun午夜阳光-第7部分

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to　keep　Bella　Swan　alive？　Emmett　was　right；　though　why　not　get　it　over　with；　either　way？　temptation　head　on。　I　would　face　the　Go　to　class；　I　ordered；　pushing　away　from　the　table。　I　turned　and　strode　away　from　them　without　looking　back。　I　could　hear　Alice　s　worry；　Jasper　s　censure；　Emmett　s　approval；　and　Rosalie　s　irritation　trailing　after　me。　I　took　one　last　deep　breath　at　the　door　of　the　classroom；　and　then　held　it　in　my　lungs　as　I　walked　into　the　small；　warm　space。　I　was　not　late。　Mr。　Banner　was　still　setting　up　for　today　s　lab。　The　girl　sat　at　my　at　our　table；　her　face　down　again；　staring　at　the　folder　she　was　doodling　on。　I　examined　the　sketch　as　I　approached；　interested　in　even　this　trivial　creation　of　her　mind；　but　it　was　meaningless。　Just　a　random　scribbling　of　loops　within　loops。　Perhaps　she　was　not　concentrating　on　the　pattern；　but　thinking　of　something　else？　I　pulled　my　chair　back　with　unnecessary　roughness；　letting　it　scrape　across　the　linoleum；　humans　always　felt　more　fortable　when　noise　announced　someone　s　approach。　I　knew　she　heard　the　sound；　she　did　not　look　up；　but　her　hand　missed　a　loop　in　the　design　she　was　drawing；　making　it　unbalanced。　Why　didn　t　she　look　up？　Probably　she　was　frightened。　I　must　be　sure　to　leave　her　with　a　different　impression　this　time。　Make　her　think　she　d　been　imagining　things　before。　Hello；　I　said　in　the　quiet　voice　I　used　when　I　wanted　to　make　humans　more　fortable；　forming　a　polite　smile　with　my　lips　that　would　not　show　any　teeth。　She　looked　up　then；　her　wide　brown　eyes　startled　almost　bewildered　and　full　of　silent　questions。　It　was　the　same　expression　that　had　been　obstructing　my　vision　for　the　last　week。　As　I　stared　into　those　oddly　deep　brown　eyes；　I　realized　that　the　hate　the　hate　I　d　imagined　this　girl　somehow　deserved　for　simply　existing　had　evaporated。　Not　breathing　now；　not　tasting　her　scent；　it　was　hard　to　believe　that　anyone　so　vulnerable　could　ever　justify　hatred。　Her　cheeks　began　to　flush；　and　she　said　nothing。　I　kept　my　eyes　on　hers；　focusing　only　on　their　questioning　depths；　and　tried　to　ignore　the　appetizing　color　of　her　skin。　I　had　enough　breath　to　speak　for　a　while　longer　without　inhaling。

My　name　is　Edward　Cullen；　I　said；　though　I　knew　she　knew　that。　It　was　the　polite　way　to　begin。　I　didn　t　have　a　chance　to　introduce　myself　last　week。　must　be　Bella　Swan。　She　seemed　confused　there　was　that　little　pucker　between　her　eyes　again。　her　half　a　second　longer　than　it　should　have　for　her　to　respond。　You　It　took　How　do　you　know　my　name？　she　demanded；　and　her　voice　shook　just　a　little。　I　must　have　truly　terrified　her。　This　made　me　feel　guilty；　she　was　just　so　defenseless。　I　laughed　gently　it　was　a　sound　that　I　knew　made　humans　more　at　ease。　Again；　I　was　careful　about　my　teeth。　Oh；　I　think　everyone　knows　your　name。　Surely　she　must　have　realized　that　she　d　bee　the　center　of　attention　in　this　monotonous　place。　The　whole　town　s　been　waiting　for　you　to　arrive。　She　frowned　as　if　this　information　was　unpleasant。　I　supposed；　being　shy　as　she　seemed　to　be；　attention　would　seem　like　a　bad　thing　to　her。　Most　humans　felt　the　opposite。　Though　they　didn　t　want　to　stand　out　from　the　herd；　at　the　same　time　they　craved　a　spotlight　for　their　individual　uniformity。　No；　she　said。　I　meant；　why　did　you　call　me　Bella？　Do　you　prefer　Isabella？　I　asked；　perplexed　by　the　fact　that　I　couldn　t　see　where　this　question　was　leading。　I　didn　t　understand。　Surely；　she　d　made　her　preference　clear　many　times　that　first　day。　Were　all　humans　this　inprehensible　without　the　mental　context　as　a　guide？　No；　I　like　Bella；　she　answered；　leaning　her　head　slightly　to　one　side。　Her　expression　if　I　was　reading　it　correctly　was　torn　between　embarrassment　and　confusion。　But　I　think　Charlie　I　mean　my　dad　must　call　me　Isabella　behind　my　back。　That　s　what　everyone　here　seems　to　know　me　as。　Her　skin　darkened　one　shade　pinker。　Oh；　I　said　lamely；　and　quickly　looked　away　from　her　face。　I　d　just　realized　what　her　questions　meant：　I　had　slipped　up　made　an　error。　If　I　hadn　t　been　eavesdropping　on　all　the　others　that　first　day；　then　I　would　have　addressed　her　initially　by　her　full　name；　just　like　everyone　else。　She　d　noticed　the　difference。　I　felt　a　pang　of　unease。　It　was　very　quick　of　her　to　pick　up　on　my　slip。　Quite　astute；　especially　for　someone　who　was　supposed　to　be　terrified　by　my　nearness。　But　I　had　bigger　problems　than　whatever　suspicions　about　me　she　might　be　keeping　locked　inside　her　head。　I　was　out　of　air。　If　I　were　going　to　speak　to　her　again；　I　would　have　to　inhale。　It　would　be　hard　to　avoid　speaking。　Unfortunately　for　her；　sharing　this　table　made　her　my　lab　partner；　and　we　would　have　to　work　together　today。　It　would　seem　odd　and　inprehensibly　rude　for　me　to　ignore　her　while　we　did　the　lab。　It　would　make　her　more　suspicious；　more　afraid　I　leaned　as　far　away　from　her　as　I　could　without　moving　my　seat；　twisting　my　head　out　into　the　aisle。　I　braced　myself；　locking　my　muscles　in　place；　and　then　sucked　in　one　quick　chestfull　of　air；　breathing　through　my　mouth　alone。

Ahh！　It　was　genuinely　painful。　Even　without　smelling　her；　I　could　taste　her　on　my　tongue。　My　throat　was　suddenly　in　flames　again；　the　craving　every　bit　as　strong　as　that　first　moment　I　d　caught　her　scent　last　week。　I　gritted　my　teeth　together　and　tried　to　pose　myself。　Get　started；　Mr。　Banner　manded。　It　felt　like　it　took　every　single　ounce　of　selfcontrol　that　I　d　achieved　in　seventy　years　of　hard　work　to　turn　back　to　the　girl；　who　was　staring　down　at　the　table；　and　smile。　Ladies　first；　partner？　I　offered。　She　looked　up　at　my　expression　and　her　face　went　blank；　her　eyes　wide。　Was　there　something　off　in　my　expression？　Was　she　frightened　again？　She　didn　t　speak。　Or；　I　could　start；　if　you　wish；　I　said　quietly。　No；　she　said；　and　her　face　went　from　white　to　red　again。　I　ll　go　first。　I　stared　at　the　equipment　on　the　table；　the　battered　microscope；　the　box　of　slides；　rather　than　watch　the　blood　swirl　under　her　clear　skin。　I　took　another　quick　breath；　through　my　teeth；　and　winced　as　the　taste　made　my　throat　ache。　Prophase；　she　said　after　a　quick　examination。　though　she　d　barely　examined　it。　She　started　to　remove　the　slide；　Do　you　mind　if　I　look？　Instinctively　stupidly；　as　if　I　were　one　of　her　kind　I　reached　out　to　stop　her　hand　from　removing　the　slide。　For　one　second；　the　heat　of　her　skin　burned　into　mine。　It　was　like　an　electric　pulse　surely　much　hotter　than　a　mere　niyeight　point　six　degrees。　The　heat　shot　through　my　hand　and　up　my　arm。　She　yanked　her　hand　out　from　under　mine。　I　m　sorry；　I　muttered　through　my　clenched　teeth。　Needing　somewhere　to　look；　I　grasped　the　microscope　and　stared　briefly　into　the　eyepiece。　She　was　right。　Prophase；　I　agreed。　I　was　still　too　unsettled　to　look　at　her。　Breathing　as　quietly　as　I　could　through　my　gritted　teeth　and　trying　to　ignore　the　fiery　thirst；　I　concentrated　on　the　simple　assignment；　writing　the　word　on　the　appropriate　line　on　the　lab　sheet；　and　then　switching　out　the　first　slide　for　the　next。　What　was　she　thinking　now？　What　had　that　felt　like　to　her；　when　I　had　touched　her　hand？　My　skin　must　have　been　ice　cold　repulsive。　No　wonder　she　was　so　quiet。　I　glanced　at　the　slide。　Anaphase；　I　said　to　myself　as　I　wrote　it　on　the　second　line。　May　I？　she　asked。　I　looked　up　at　her；　surprised　to　see　that　she　was　waiting　expectantly；　one　hand　halfstretched　toward　the　microscope。　She　didn　t　look　afraid。　Did　she　really

think　I　d　gotten　the　answer　wrong？　I　couldn　t　help　but　smile　at　the　hopeful　look　on　her　face　as　I　slid　the　microscope　toward　her。　She　stared　into　the　eyepiece　with　an　eagerness　that　quickly　faded。　her　mouth　turned　down。　The　corners　of　Slide　three？　she　asked；　not　looking　up　from　the　microscope；　but　holding　out　her　hand。　I　dropped　the　next　slide　into　her　hand；　not　letting　my　skin　e　anywhere　close　to　hers　this　time。　Sitting　beside　her　was　like　sitting　next　to　a　heat　lamp。　I　could　feel　myself　warming　slightly　to　the　higher　temperature。　She　did　not　look　at　the　slide　for　long。　Interphase；　she　said　nonchalantly　perhaps　trying　a　little　too　hard　to　sound　that　way　and　pushed　the　microscope　to　me。　She　did　not　touch　the　paper；　but　waited　for　me　to　write　the　answer。　I　checked　she　was　correct　again。　We　finished　this　way；　speaking　one　word　at　a　time　and　never　meeting　each　other　s　eyes。　We　were　the　only　ones　done　the　others　in　the　class　were　having　a　harder　time　with　the　lab。　Mike　Newton　seemed　to　be　having　trouble　concentrating　he　was　trying　to　watch　Bella　and　me。　Wish　he　d　stayed　wherever　he　went；　Mike　thought；　eyeing　me　sulfurously。　Hmm；　interesting。　I　hadn　t　realized　the　boy　harbored　any　ill　will　towards　me。　This　was　a　new　development；　about　as　recent　as　the　girl　s　arrival　it　seemed。　Even　more　interesting；　I　found　to　my　surprise　that　the　feeling　was　mutual。　I　looked　down　at　the　girl　again；　bemused　by　the　wide　range　of　havoc　and　upheaval　that；　despite　her　ordinary；　unthreatening　appearance；　she　was　wreaking　on　my　life。　It　wasn　t　that　I　couldn　t　see　what　Mike　was　going　on　about。　She　was　actually　rather　pretty　in　an　unusual　way。　Better　than　being　beautiful；　her　face　was　interesting。　Not　quite　symmetrical　her　narrow　chin　out　of　balance　with　her　wide　cheekbones；　extreme　in　the　coloring　the　light　and　dark　contrast　of　her　skin　and　her　hair；　and　then　there　were　the　eyes；　brimming　over　with　silent　secrets　Eyes　that　were　suddenly　boring　into　mine。　I　stared　back　at　her；　trying　to　guess　even　one　of　those　secrets。　Did　you　get　contacts？　she　asked　abruptly。　What　a　strange　question。　eyesight。　Oh；　she　mumbled。　No。　I　almost　smiled　at　the　idea　of　improving　my　I　thought　there　was　something　different　about　your　eyes。　I　felt　suddenly　colder　again　as　I　realized　that　I　was　apparently　not　the　only　one　attempting　to　ferret　out　secrets　today。　I　shrugged；　my　shoulders　stiff；　and　glared　straight　ahead　to　where　the　teacher　was　making　his　rounds。　Of　course　there　was　something　different　about　my　eyes　since　the　last　time　she　d　stared　into　them。　To　prepare　myself　for　today　s　ordeal；　today　s　temptation；　I　d　spent　the　entire　weekend　hunting；　satiating　my　thirst　as　much　as　possible；　overdoing　it　really。　I　d　glutted　myself　on　the　blood　of　animals；　not　that　it　made　much　difference　in　the　face　of　the　outrageous　flavor　floating　on　the　air　around

her。　When　I　d　glared　at　her　last；　my　eyes　had　been　black　with　thirst。　Now；　my　body　swimming　with　blood；　my　eyes　were　a　warmer　gold。　Light　amber　from　my　excessive　attempt　at　thirstquenching。　Another　slip。　told　her　yes。　If　I　d　seen　what　she　d　meant　with　her　question；　I　could　have　just　I　d　sat　beside　humans　for　two　years　now　at　this　school；　and　she　was　the　first　to　examine　me　closely　enough　to　note　the　change　in　my　eye　color。　The　others；　while　admiring　the　beauty　of　my　family；　tended　to　look　down　quickly　when　we　returned　their　stares。　They　shied　away；　blocking　the　details　of　our　appearances　in　an　instinctive　endeavor　to　keep　themselves　from　understanding。　Ignorance　was　bliss　to　the　human　mind。　Why　did　it　have　to　be　this　girl　who　would　see　too　much？　Mr。　Banner　approached　our　table。　I　gratefully　inhaled　the　gush　of　clean　air　he　brought　with　him　before　it　could　mix　with　her　scent。　So；　Edward；　he　said；　looking　over　our　answers；　didn　t　you　think　Isabella　should　get　a　chance　with　the　microscope？　Bella；　I　corrected　him　reflexively。　five。　Actually；　she　identified　three