[夜与日].(night.and.day).(英)弗吉尼亚·伍尔芙.文字版-第77部分

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376　



Virginia　Woolf　

humiliated。　She　had　known　William　for　years；　and　she　
had　never　once　guessed　that　he　loved　children。　She　looked　
at　the　queer　glow　of　exaltation　in　Cassandra’s　eyes；　
through　which　she　was　beholding　the　true　spirit　of　a　
human　being；　and　wished　that　she　would　go　on　talking　
about　William　for　ever。　Cassandra　was　not　unwilling　to　
gratify　her。　She　talked　on。　The　morning　slipped　away。　
Katharine　scarcely　changed　her　position　on　the　edge　of　
her　father’s　writingtable；　and　Cassandra　never　opened　
the　“History　of　England。”　

And　yet　it　must　be　confessed　that　there　were　vast　lapses　
in　the　attention　which　Katharine　bestowed　upon　her　
cousin。　The　atmosphere　was　wonderfully　congenial　for　
thoughts　of　her　own。　She　lost　herself　sometimes　in　such　
deep　reverie　that　Cassandra；　pausing；　could　look　at　her　
for　moments　unperceived。　What　could　Katharine　be　thinking　
about；　unless　it　were　Ralph　Denham？　She　was　satisfied；　
by　certain　random　replies；　that　Katharine　had　wandered　
a　little　from　the　subject　of　William’s　perfections。　
But　Katharine　made　no　sign。　She　always　ended　these　
pauses　by　saying　something　so　natural　that　Cassandra　

was　deluded　into　giving　fresh　examples　of　her　absorbing　
theme。　Then　they　lunched；　and　the　only　sign　that　
Katharine　gave　of　abstraction　was　to　forget　to　help　the　
pudding。　She　looked　so　like　her　mother；　as　she　sat　there　
oblivious　of　the　tapioca；　that　Cassandra　was　startled　into　
exclaiming：　

“How　like　Aunt　Maggie　you　look！”　

“Nonsense；”　said　Katharine；　with　more　irritation　than　
the　remark　seemed　to　call　for。　

In　truth；　now　that　her　mother　was　away；　Katharine　did　
feel　less　sensible　than　usual；　but　as　she　argued　it　to　
herself；　there　was　much　less　need　for　sense。　Secretly；　she　
was　a　little　shaken　by　the　evidence　which　the　morning　
had　supplied　of　her　immense　capacity　for—what　could　
one　call　it？—rambling　over　an　infinite　variety　of　thoughts　
that　were　too　foolish　to　be　named。　She　was；　for　example；　
walking　down　a　road　in　Northumberland　in　the　August　
sunset；　at　the　inn　she　left　her　panion；　who　was　Ralph　
Denham；　and　was　transported；　not　so　much　by　her　own　
feet　as　by　some　invisible　means；　to　the　top　of　a　high　hill。　
Here　the　scents；　the　sounds　among　the　dry　heatherroots；　

377　



Night　and　Day　

the　grassblades　pressed　upon　the　palm　of　her　hand；　were　
all　so　perceptible　that　she　could　experience　each　one　
separately。　After　this　her　mind　made　excursions　into　the　
dark　of　the　air；　or　settled　upon　the　surface　of　the　sea；　
which　could　be　discovered　over　there；　or　with　equal　unreason　
it　returned　to　its　couch　of　bracken　beneath　the　
stars　of　midnight；　and　visited　the　snow　valleys　of　the　
moon。　These　fancies　would　have　been　in　no　way　strange；　
since　the　walls　of　every　mind　are　decorated　with　some　
such　tracery；　but　she　found　herself　suddenly　pursuing　such　
thoughts　with　an　extreme　ardor；　which　became　a　desire　
to　change　her　actual　condition　for　something　matching　
the　conditions　of　her　dream。　Then　she　started；　then　she　
awoke　to　the　fact　that　Cassandra　was　looking　at　her　in　
amazement。　

Cassandra　would　have　liked　to　feel　certain　that；　when　
Katharine　made　no　reply　at　all　or　one　wide　of　the　mark；　
she　was　making　up　her　mind　to　get　married　at　once；　but　
it　was　difficult；　if　this　were　so；　to　account　for　some　remarks　
that　Katharine　let　fall　about　the　future。　She　recurred　
several　times　to　the　summer；　as　if　she　meant　to　

spend　that　season　in　solitary　wandering。　She　seemed　to　
have　a　plan　in　her　mind　which　required　Bradshaws　and　
the　names　of　inns。　

Cassandra　was　driven　finally；　by　her　own　unrest；　to　put　
on　her　clothes　and　wander　out　along　the　streets　of　Chelsea；　
on　the　pretence　that　she　must　buy　something。　But；　in　
her　ignorance　of　the　way；　she　became　panicstricken　at　
the　thought　of　being　late；　and　no　sooner　had　she　found　
the　shop　she　wanted；　than　she　fled　back　again　in　order　
to　be　at　home　when　William　came。　He　came；　indeed；　five　
minutes　after　she　had　sat　down　by　the　teatable；　and　she　
had　the　happiness　of　receiving　him　alone。　His　greeting　
put　her　doubts　of　his　affection　at　rest；　but　the　first　question　
he　asked　was：　

“Has　Katharine　spoken　to　you？”　

“Yes。　But　she　says　she’s　not　engaged。　She　doesn’t　seem　
to　think　she’s　ever　going　to　be　engaged。”　

William　frowned；　and　looked　annoyed。　

“They　telephoned　this　morning；　and　she　behaves　very　
oddly。　She　forgets　to　help　the　pudding；”　Cassandra　added　
by　way　of　cheering　him。　

378　



Virginia　Woolf　

“My　dear　child；　after　what　I　saw　and　heard　last　night；　
it’s　not　a　question　of　guessing　or　suspecting。　Either　she’s　
engaged　to　him—or—”　

He　left　his　sentence　unfinished；　for　at　this　point　
Katharine　herself　appeared。　With　his　recollections　of　the　
scene　the　night　before；　he　was　too　selfconscious　even　to　
look　at　her；　and　it　was　not　until　she　told　him　of　her　
mother’s　visit　to　StratfordonAvon　that　he　raised　his　eyes。　
It　was　clear　that　he　was　greatly　relieved。　He　looked　round　
him　now；　as　if　he　felt　at　his　ease；　and　Cassandra　exclaimed：　


“Don’t　you　think　everything　looks　quite　different？”　

“You’ve　moved　the　sofa？”　he　asked。　

“No。　Nothing’s　been　touched；”　said　Katharine。　
“Everything’s　exactly　the　same。”　But　as　she　said　this；　with　
a　decision　which　seemed　to　make　it　imply　that　more　than　
the　sofa　was　unchanged；　she　held　out　a　cup　into　which　
she　had　forgotten　to　pour　any　tea。　Being　told　of　her　forgetfulness；　
she　frowned　with　annoyance；　and　said　that　
Cassandra　was　demoralizing　her。　The　glance　she　cast　upon　
them；　and　the　resolute　way　in　which　she　plunged　them　

into　speech；　made　William　and　Cassandra　feel　like　children　
who　had　been　caught　prying。　They　followed　her　obediently；　
making　conversation。　Any　one　ing　in　might　
have　judged　them　acquaintances　met；　perhaps；　for　the　
third　time。　If　that　were　so；　one　must　have　concluded　that　
the　hostess　suddenly　bethought　her　of　an　engagement　
pressing　for　fulfilment。　First　Katharine　looked　at　her　watch；　
and　then　she　asked　William　to　tell　her　the　right　time。　
When　told　that　it　was　ten　minutes　to　five　she　rose　at　
once；　and　said：　

“Then　I’m　afraid　I　must　go。”　

She　left　the　room；　holding　her　unfinished　bread　and　
butter　in　her　hand。　William　glanced　at　Cassandra。　

“Well；　she　is　queer！”　Cassandra　exclaimed。　

William　looked　perturbed。　He　knew　more　of　Katharine　
than　Cassandra　did；　but　even　he　could　not　tell—。　In　a　
second　Katharine　was　back　again　dressed　in　outdoor　
things；　still　holding　her　bread　and　butter　in　her　bare　hand。　

“If　I’m　late；　don’t　wait　for　me；”　she　said。　“I　shall　have　
dined；”　and　so　saying；　she　left　them。　

“But　she　can’t—”　William　exclaimed；　as　the　door　shut；　

379　



Night　and　Day　

“not　without　any　gloves　and　bread　and　butter　in　her　hand！”　
They　ran　to　the　window；　and　saw　her　walking　rapidly　along　
the　street　towards　the　City。　Then　she　vanished。　

“She　must　have　gone　to　meet　Mr。　Denham；”　Cassandra　
exclaimed。　

“Goodness　knows！”　William　interjected。　

The　incident　impressed　them　both　as　having　something　
queer　and　ominous　about　it　out　of　all　proportion　to　its　
surface　strangeness。　

“It’s　the　sort　of　way　Aunt　Maggie　behaves；”　said　
Cassandra；　as　if　in　explanation。　

William　shook　his　head；　and　paced　up　and　down　the　
room　looking　extremely　perturbed。　

“This　is　what　I’ve　been　foretelling；”　he　burst　out。　“Once　
set　the　ordinary　conventions　aside—Thank　Heaven　Mrs。　
Hilbery　is　away。　But　there’s　Mr。　Hilbery。　How　are　we　to　
explain　it　to　him？　I　shall　have　to　leave　you。”　

“But　Uncle　Trevor　won’t　be　back　for　hours；　William！”　
Cassandra　implored。　

“You　never　can　tell。　He　may　be　on　his　way　already。　Or　
suppose　Mrs。　Milvain—your　Aunt　Celia—or　Mrs。　Cosham；　

or　any　other　of　your　aunts　or　uncles　should　be　shown　in　
and　find　us　alone　together。　You　know　what　they’re　saying　
about　us　already。”　

Cassandra　was　equally　stricken　by　the　sight　of　William’s　
agitation；　and　appalled　by　the　prospect　of　his　desertion。　

“We　might　hide；”　she　exclaimed　wildly；　glancing　at　the　
curtain　which　separated　the　room　with　the　relics。　

“I　refuse　entirely　to　get　under　the　table；”　said　William　
sarcastically。　

She　saw　that　he　was　losing　his　temper　with　the　difficulties　
of　the　situation。　Her　instinct　told　her　that　an　appeal　
to　his　affection；　at　this　moment；　would　be　extremely　
illjudged。　She　controlled　herself；　sat　down；　poured　out　a　
fresh　cup　of　tea；　and　sipped　it　quietly。　This　natural　action；　
arguing　plete　selfmastery；　and　showing　her　in　
one　of　those　feminine　attitudes　which　William　found　adorable；　
did　more　than　any　argument　to　pose　his　agitation。　
It　appealed　to　his　chivalry。　He　accepted　a　cup。　Next　
she　asked　for　a　slice　of　cake。　By　the　time　the　cake　was　
eaten　and　the　tea　drunk　the　personal　question　had　lapsed；　
and　they　were　discussing　poetry。　Insensibly　they　turned　

380　



Virginia　Woolf　

from　the　question　of　dramatic　poetry　in　general；　to　the　
particular　example　which　reposed　in　William’s　pocket；　and　
when　the　maid　came　in　to　clear　away　the　teathings；　
William　had　asked　permission　to　read　a　short　passage　
aloud；　“unless　it　bored　her？”　

Cassandra　bent　her　head　in　silence；　but　she　showed　a　
little　of　what　she　felt　in　her　eyes；　and　thus　fortified；　William　
felt　confident　that　it　would　take　more　than　Mrs。　Milvain　
herself　to　rout　him　from　his　position。　He　read　aloud。　

Meanwhile　Katharine　walked　rapidly　along　the　street。　
If　called　upon　to　explain　her　impulsive　action　in　leaving　
the　teatable；　she　could　have　traced　it　to　no　better　cause　
than　that　William　had　glanced　at　Cassandra；　Cassandra　at　
William。　Yet；　because　they　had　glanced；　her　position　was　
impossible。　If　one　forgot　to　pour　out　a　cup　of　tea　they　
rushed　to　the　conclusion　that　she　was　engaged　to　Ralph　
Denham。　She　knew　that　in　half　an　hour　or　so　the　door　
would　open；　and　Ralph　Denham　would　appear。　She　could　
not　sit　there　and　contemplate　seeing　him　with　William’s　
and　Cassandra’s　eyes　upon　them；　judging　their　exact　degree　
of　intimacy；　so　that　they　might　fix　the　weddingday。　

She　promptly　decided　that　she　would　meet　Ralph　out　of　
doors；　she　still　had　time　to　reach　Lincoln’s　Inn　Fields　
before　he　left　his　office。　She　hailed　a　cab；　and　bade　it　
take　her　to　a　shop　for　selling　maps　which　she　remembered　
in　Great　Queen　Street；　since　she　hardly　liked　to　be　
set　down　at　his　door。　Arrived　at　the　shop；　she　bought　a　
large　scale　map　of　Norfolk；　and　thus　provided；　hurried　
into　Lincoln’s　Inn　Fields；　and　assured　herself　of　the　position　
of　Messrs。　Hoper　and　Grateley’s　office。　The　great　gas　
chandeliers　were　alight　in　the　office　windows。　She　conceived　
that　he　sat　at　an　enormous　table　laden　with　papers　
beneath　one　of　them　in　the　front　room　with　the　
three　tall　windows。　Having　settled　his　position　there；　she　
began　walking　to　and　fro　upon　the　pavement。　Nobody　of　
his　build　appeared。　She　scrutinized　each　male　figure　as　it　
approached　and　passed　her。　Each　male　figure　had；　nevertheless；　
a　look　of　him；　due；　perhaps；　to　the　professional　
dress；　the　quick　step；　the　keen　glance　which　they　cast　
upon　her